Another Year Over

So this year is done. I was really excited about next year starting because for about 10 minutes, I thought 2009 was going to be the year of the Pig according to the Chinese flimflam calendar but I had not listened intently to that particular news story last night. It's not the year of the Pig, it's the year of the Ox. Twelve piglets were born somewhere in a chinese zoo and that means good luck for the next year, hence my confusion over the year of the pig. The chinese consider me to be a pig since I was born in 1971, or maybe it's because I don't capitalize "chinese". I just looked up this page on my pig characteristics and it states that there is no left or right with me, apparently only straight ahead. Now my inability to tell my left from my right makes perfect sense. I'm a believer.



I finally remembered to download one of my favorite pieces of music yesterday. It's by ABBA, that's right ABBA, and it is the last track on their album Arrival. That was the first album I ever owned. Tom took it with him to Memphis because he had a turn table and I didn't. Now that he's gone, his wife will never give it back to me. Funny how sometimes you don't miss something until there's no chance of ever getting it back. Since it was written before videos were even remotely cool, here's a YouTube version of it but the visuals suck so just close your eyes and listen.



I also ran across this article yesterday in the New York Times which made me all mushy and sentimental, so I developed a list of things I'll try in the new year:



1. Finishing that goddamn bodice

2. Re-learning how to play an old instrument

3. Making new props to both confuse and amaze

4. Sending out those articles and essays I've been meaning to do for the last two years but have been too scared

5. Building my own deck



Here are some things I'm not going to try:



1. Shotgunning a can of Schiltz

2. Learning chinese

3. Cleaning out my own sewer line

4. Skydiving

5. Ecstacy



Have a happy New Year's everyone!

Ouch

The Thermos company makes really good thermoses. How do I know? I fell on mine twice this morning and it didn't even dent. I would have been here about 20 minutes earlier but it's a bit treacherous out there. Two miles into it, I decided to walk in the street instead and brave the half-awake driver. According to my calculations, the chance of being hit by a Honda is much less than the probability of me falling every two steps on the sidewalk. I have enough cush for either one, so ultimately I'll be okay.

The holiday season hasn't officially ended yet before the next season has started, that being........TAX SEASON!!! WOOHOO!! I just got my 1040 instructions in the mail yesterday. I'll have to check through that first-time home owners credit. I didn't get to take it last year because I hadn't bought my home after April 2007, I missed it by one month. I believe I can therefore go back to 2006 and amend. Boy, that'd be nice. There's this small detail about a credit being reduced by the economic stimulus payment I received. That'll definitely need more looking into. What ever I get back in refunds this year will have to be saved in the event that property taxes increase for me in July or thereabouts. I take one tax refund and put it toward another tax. I feel like throwing tea off of a boat somewhere.

Time to go read up on the hullabaloo over in the Middle East. I believe a weapon has been discharged in the area?

Christmas part II - thank god it's over

Well that lasted about two days too long. I think next year I'll stay in town for one day and then take off for parts unknown. One day is perfect; you have some prep work if you're hosting the food-eating, otherwise you just make sure to shower (wear deodorant please!!) grab a present and head out the door. You then get to chat and laugh, maybe play a few games, go home happy and sleep well. That's it. After that, get out of bed and do something and STOP EATING ALL OF THAT CRAP. It's only going to put you in a bad mood only you won't know why you're in a bad mood. Maybe a miracle will happen with the economy this year so that I'll be able to stop into the aunt and uncle's house next year, have above mentioned fun and then hop a plane to Hawaii the next day.

Christmas eve was great, as I've already detailed, but christmas day, um, it was okay. I went to see the other side of the family where auntie brought her two out-of-control mutts with and the cousin was trying to catch up to his new 21-year-old status of being able to legally drink. Uncle bonehead was well into the bag when I got there at 3:30pm and like most drunks, his volume increased with each syllable. By 5:00pm, the combination of Tibetan terriers jumping up on me and voices never stopping were enough to convince me to pack it in and head home. Mom was going to head to the other brother's house so that way, we covered all of the relatives.

Mom had left her gloves at my house on Wednesday so I called her on Friday to let her know I'd drop them by. I didn't get a call back and when I drove past the house (all seven times from Friday morning until Sunday morning) it looked like someone was home but the car hadn't ever moved and I didn't see a lot of footprints. This is where my irrational thought process kicked in. See, I wasn't willing to go into the house because I'm not going to do that anymore while dad still occupies it which mom is aware of but that doesn't stop her from trying to trick me into entering the house and when I don't, giving me the terribly-hurt look which makes me feel guilty and very angry. My plan was to put the gloves in the mail box when she wasn't home but she was never not home which isn't like her. That's where I started to get really worried that maybe she did try to drink all of the wine I gave her for christmas and fell down the stairs. I couldn't relax the rest of the weekend until last night when I called again and this time she finally answered. She had gotten the flu on Thursday and stayed home the whole weekend. She kept looking in the mail box for the gloves and wondering why I hadn't dropped them off yet. I just let her think I'm irresponsible. It's easier that way.

So now I'm back at work and my goodness, I have to work a whole three days this week! How am I going to get through it? I'm used to two days now. I'm not going to tell anyone that I'm working on Wednesday so hopefully I'll be able to get all the filing and crap done that I was hoping to get done last week. Shhh, don't tell.

This is also the universal "look back at the year" week. I'll work on that tomorrow. In the meantime, start putting your resolution lists together so we can have something to laugh at.

Christmas part I

This is traditionally the time of year that I dread most because it’s so built up, you get your hopes high for marvelous things to happen but yet terribly things happen too which you remember for years afterwords which is what fills you with the dread at the same time that your wishing for marvelous things to happen.

This year is finally progressing marvelously. I got everything baked and bought in time. Mom came over for a short time on Wednesday. She’s hooked on white merlot now (maybe I shouldn’t be using the term “hooked” in that sentence) so I bought her a bottle of it but Haskell’s only had the big-ass bottle left so she is now the proud owner of a 1.5 liter bottle of wine to keep herself warm on New Year’s Eve. I told her she can’t drink it all at once.

I then went over to my aunt and uncle’s house in St. Paul Park. This is my dad’s brother Jerry, the one with the best sense of humor. My four cousins came over too which was so frickin’ awesome I could barely stand it. I have one cousin, Todd, who wears one white sock and one black sock. His hair is a bit messed up and he didn’t shave. His older brother Dean has changed his name to Larz and apparently has great directional difficulty (perhaps it’s the left hand/right hand trouble I have) so he and his woman were the last to arrive. Cousin #3 Jeff is a paramedic and brought his new girlfriend, the N. Mpls cop who works with Mederia Arradondo whom I knew for a year when he was the spotter on the Roosevelt gymnastics team in ’84-’85. Last cousin Jo Lynn brought her twelve-year-old son Zach who is just about the tallest one in the room. As each person would arrive, the one-liners would zing at higher and higher speeds. We all find it hysterically funny to make fun of and slightly threaten each other. That can be done in a funny way, it really can.

When it was time for present-opening, I was sitting next to Jerry. Jo Lynn brought out a present for him which was a case engulfed in a Christmas-patterned garbage bag. It looked like a gun case to me so I blurted out “Oo, it’s a gun!” then proceeded to ask if bullets were included. I got the super glare from Jo Lynn and aunt Leigh Ann. Apparently I had hit the nail on the head and it was in fact a 30.6 with a scope and all. I asked Jerry to keep it away from Jo Lynn otherwise she’d shoot me with it. But come on though, gun cases are pretty easily identified. Did they really think Jerry wasn’t going to figure that one out? I was just stating the obvious.

I love watching people open presents. The best part of any holiday is getting too many people to sit in a small room and open presents. There’s wrapping paper everywhere and even though there are garbage bags brought out especially to help clean up while the present-opening is occurring, none of the paper ever seems to make it into the bags until about an hour later.

Christmas day will now bring some movie watching courtesy of Netflix who delivered The Dark Knight and Idiocracy on Wednesday, just in time for me to have a great Christmas. I’ll then move on to the other side of the family to dine and chat for a bit. This side of the family has little to no sense of humor so I’ll most likely be making an early exit. When they make fun of people, they mean it.

I have to go kick The Cat off of the new comfy blanket I got from my BFF and watch a little entertainment on the boob tube. How did that saying ever get started? Porn has never been on network TV as far as I know.

Anyone Got Some Syrup? I'm Going To Make A Snowcone.

Early morning is the best time to get to campus, especially on a morning like this. It is so frickin' beautiful outside that it would be impossible for you to stay in a bad mood for long if you just take a quick look around. Just look up once, then go back to being grumpy.

There's one particular scene that's my favorite. There's a clearing in between Wulling and Eddy Halls with Burton in the background. It's filled with pine trees and driving paths. With the snow falling and the street lights still on, it looks like one of those screen saver winter scenes you can download for free at goaheadanddownloadthisalthoughImayinfectyourcomputer.com.

I like those smaller moments. Those are the ones that always stick in my mind more than big, grand moments with spot lights and applause. They exist throughout the entire day too. This is why I always try to be prepared, so I can enjoy the moments that suddenly come up. That might sound a bit backwards but really, it's not. I plan things as much as I do so that when I need to, I can experience an unexpected moment.

There was a woman in my Performance Course who made a comment that's very fitting. All of us were dancing solos and most of us were choreographing them. Leslie encourages us to learn how to improv more because it does make you a better dancer but it takes time to be able to do that. You have to become very familiar with the music genre to know what kind of tempo change may be coming up. Until we've learned more though, I stick to choreography. Cindy said that she was choreographing so that she could improv. She meant that she wanted the whole dance planned out but being a solo, if she messed up or forgot something (which almost ALWAYS happens) she could improv and still be confident that it would turn out okay. That's how I pretty much live. I plan a lot of things and am very structured so that when I have to, I can improv and things will be okay.

When something tragic happens, the last thing you want to deal with is the dishes or the gutter that's falling off. If you get all of this stuff taken care of, you can deal with the tragedy at hand and face it fully instead of having to push it to the side. Plus, I get to look out of my kitchen window and watch the snow fall while I do dishes. Doing things in a very structured way doesn't mean that you're missing out on things. It's quite the opposite. You're experiencing everything that's happening at that moment. The smell of summer air changes from the morning when you're mowing, to the afternoon when you water the plants. I have to have my desk near a window so I can monitor the changes outside while simultaneously glaring into a computer screen. You have to catch each moment and brand it into your mind because you never know what phone call you'll receive an hour from now. When you're sitting in the hospital or where ever, you can remember for a moment, how all of those pine trees looked at 6:45am.

Did any of that make any sense? No? Okay, go outside and look at the snow.

And That's A Wrap

It's finally here, the weekend. I was determined to get through a ton of work so I could spend next work week (which consists of two days) filing crap and getting things in order that need to be in order for that unsuspecting audit visit that could happen at any time. I've almost succeeded. I'm going to say that I have a 95% success rate. That's not bad considering that when I dove into one problem, it produced five more problems to solve before the original problem could be solved but by the time I got those five new problems solved, I forgot what the first problem was.

How about that senate race? At least it's exciting. I would consider it a waste if all throughout the process, the same guy was in the lead.

How about that new credit card ruling on deceitful charges and unfair raising of interest rates? It sounds great except that it won't take affect until 2010 and from now until then, the credit card companies are going to screw us every which way but loose to make up for anything they might start losing in July 2010. Anyone with a lot of credit card debt is fucked...that would be me.

How about that D-con commercial that's been altered? There has been a D-con commercial featuring what appears to be an exterminator stating how he "sees this all the time" and then there's a cut to a kitchen cupboard where a little girl is reaching up to the top shelf which she can't see but the audience can see has spilt cereal and several roaches in among the corn flakes. The new altered version, viewed for the first time last night, has the roaches removed from the corn flakes so all you see is a messy shelf. Why would D-con agree to that? Before the commercial was saying that there are roaches only centimeters away from your children's fingers so you better get our product. Now it's saying that D-con will clean up spilt cereal and that just doesn't make any sense.

How about that Bernie Madoff? What a fucker.

I believe I'll close on that note.

The Funniest Time Of Year

Winter is funny. At least this one is so far. According to the calendar, we have four more days before winter solstice which makes me shake my head inconspicuously when people mistake it for the beginning of winter. It's not the beginning of winter, it's the moment when the sun is at it's greatest distance from the celestial equator shining directly over the tropic of Capricorn. Winter begins when it's fucking cold.

You know what happens when it's fucking cold? People wear scarves around their faces when they're, oh say, walking to and from work. Do you know what happens when cat hair gets on the scarf? There's a tendency to sneeze. Here's the scene: I am walking in the cold with four pairs of pants on, four shirts, one big jacket, two scarves, ear muffs and a hat. I'm unable to move much at all quite like the little brother in A Christmas Story. Suddenly, I get the sensation that I'm about to sneeze. I start to panic knowing that I will never get my arms up to my face in time to move the scarves out of the way of the flying snot. I stop walking and stand still raising my arms up as high as they'll go still trying to make an attempt to get to my face all the while saying "No! God No!!" Somehow that worked and I didn't sneeze; catastrophe averted.

Winter makes some people cranky although I don't know why people in warm climates would be cranky like the guy who threw his shoes at our valiant leader. By now, I'm sure you've all seen the footage. What I love most about that is after the first shoe, George popped his head right back up and I swear there's a smirk on his face. He looks like the bully on the playground taunting the nerd who's finally had it and is trying to fight back "Come on ya pansy, throw the other one!" So the guy does (ha!) and again Georgy ducks at the last second and finishes his macho stance by pushing away the security guy and refusing help. He can take this nut case on his own. Hilarious. I heard some newscaster say that in Iraqi culture, throwing your shoe at someone is a sign of disrespect. Really??!! I'll have to remember that.

It's Dec. 16th which means that Minneapolis park ice rinks should have opened yesterday. It's cold enough so the rink by my house has no excuse not to be open like they weren't last year when I had poor Penn and his family drive half way across the world to come over and go skating and there was no skating. If they're not open, I'm going to throw my skates at them. You saw that coming didn't you?

Hot Tub Anyone?

I'm here, I made it, I'm actually sweating. I walk to work for a number of reasons; it's cheap, it's about the same amount of time after you factor in car-warming and parking-space-finding, I'm saving the environment *snicker/snort*, I get all my exercise in and don't have to pay extra for a gym membership, I get to look into the windows of rich people's houses along the river road and the last goofy reason is that it makes coming inside all the more rewarding on days like this. Since I figured I would really think it was cold by going from 35 degrees above zero to 2500 degrees below zero, I put on four pairs of pants, four shirts, two pairs of socks and two scarves before heading out this morning. I wasn't even cold for a second. My hands started to sweat about fifteen minutes into the walk. I have my mittens turned inside out so they dry before I have to go home. Seriously, walking or doing anything else outside in cold weather isn't that bad. Your body heat kicks in after about 5 - 10 minutes and you warm up nicely.

Today is the first day of the new reign for the Finance Director. Since we don't have any money, you'd think his job would be really easy. On the contrary, he's going to be shoved head first into this venti cup of crazy that I predict will have him mumbling incoherently to himself in a matter of months, maybe weeks. It's too bad he's bald, he has nothing to pull out.

This is it, the last week to get any serious work done until January. I have my list made and my piles organized. I'm determined to not get too derailed by others' requests. I'm so thankful that I have my own office. I can not answer the phone if I want and no one really knows. Everything should be okay as long as I don't get too preoccupied with blogging.

See No Evil, Hear No Evil

I have to stop watching the evening news for awhile. It doesn't matter if I don't catch the weather, it'll be cold enough to wear a jacket from now until April so no new news there. I don't really care about sports. My budget is so tight that it doesn't matter if my property taxes go up, I can't do any more than I'm already doing so the only thing I'll miss out on is hearing about how people are running over each other and tossing old ladies down a driveway. I'm having a reaction to something I'm putting on my face so now I look on the outside how I feel on the inside...irritated.

Well, that's not a very good way to start out a Friday. On the upside, I'm going to see the Nutcracker with mom this weekend which includes a nice dinner somewhere so there'll be food and entertainment. I should send out christmas cards. That always makes me feel better. Then I'll see if I can scam some free postage off of the postage meter at work. Good thing no one at work reads this blog.

Time to make the donuts.

Oh Please

Why are people still falling for the "your bank account is closed" scam? How many years has this been going on? It has to be at least five years by now. So the scams may be becoming more intricate now with fancy graphics and texting and all. If those scammers took half the energy they use creating a scam and put it into a day job, I'd bet we'd finally locate that water on Mars.

The PBS/TPT Pledge Drive is nearing an end and now they're programming "viewers favorites". So far, it seems all people want to see is how to get more money and brains. I think it's a bit comical how the supposed brain doc, who points out that memorization is good for the brain, can't seem to remember how his lecture is going to go. He glances over to the teleprompter every two seconds. I find it distracting.

I'm getting the urge to go skating again. I tried several times to go last year but never quite made it. That Rice Park set up looks pretty inviting. That might have to be experienced. Anyone else up for skating?

Oo, I just got a text; apparently I have to call my banker for something.....see you later.

Catch-up

I had to wait a whole five and a half hours to write today because as soon as I got in, I was bombarded with transactions being made on wrong account numbers. While I was figuring out one problem and who was doing it, someone else was expensing something they shouldn't to somewhere they shouldn't. I feel like I'm chasing my tail.

Speaking of tails, I haven't seen the mouse back yet. Maybe The Cat did get him when I wasn't around. I think that may be the case because he's not camped out in front of the cupboard where the mouse was gracious enough to leave his droppings behind. If there's a mouse anywhere in the house, The Cat will plop himself directly in front of where the mouse actually is although the mouse is often not visible to human eyes. The Cat will proceed to not move an inch until he's captured said mouse. This morning, The Cat was not camped out but instead, under foot.

Speaking of feet, I didn't have to lift mine has high on the way home last night because most people had shoveled by then. There is one block along the river road where someone must own an industrial-sized snow blower or just like to walk and blow at the same time because the entire block had been cleared. Isn't that the nicest thing ever? I would LOVE it if someone would do that to my block. There were other blocks where no one had shoveled yet this morning and by now, lots of people have trampled across it so now the snow is really packed down. You know it's going to stay there the entire winter.

Speaking of winter, it's here.

Speaking of here, my lunch time is up so I have to go back to chasing my tail.

Shoveled Walks Are An Oasis

Boy, that Pavarotti sure could sing. I was all cozy last night on the couch thinking it was a perfect night to do just that since I had already shoveled and loaded the mouse ammo in the kitchen. I have a mouse back again and I'm a bit surprised that The Cat hasn't been able to get it yet. He was noisy Sunday night when I didn't have any ammo and mysteriously quiet last night when I finally cocked and loaded the trap directly in his path. Sneaky little fuckers. Anyway, I thought I had completed my civic duty of clearing my walkway only to discover this morning that even more snow had fallen since I finished. It hadn't just fallen on my sidewalk either, unfortunately. That meant walking through snow all the way to work this morning. Before you start to scoff and exclaim that it's only 3 inches or so, go walk through it for three miles on suddenly uneven terrain that was even only a few days ago which makes you appear intoxicated as you trudge on with your bag around your shoulder filled with coffee and normal clothing. Now I remember why I liked spring so much last year.

I love the Thermos. Brilliant invention. We have a little coffee maker in our copy room but my supervisor keeps forgetting to either turn off the burner after she's done, which scorches the coffee to the pot, or forgets to empty the grounds, which grow mold on them over the weekend. I'm not using that coffee maker anymore.

I suddenly realized last night that New Years' Eve is coming up. This may come as a surprise to you also which is why I decided to mention it here. I spent thirteen years always having to work on New Years' Eve so now that I don't work in an industry that's open absolutely every day of the year, I forget what it is people usually do on that evening. I know what I don't want to do. I don't want to go to a hotel bar and have fifty million Long Island Ice Teas to the point where I puke in the restroom, or lean over the railing and puke, or throw up into the pool, or fight in the lobby. I've been on the other end of that and I'd hate to start anyone else's new year on that note.

Speaking of notes, I haven't tried my oboe yet at home. I didn't have time over the weekend and last night I was waaaaaaaay too busy watching A Charlie Brown Christmas. I think tonight would be good after I move the fridge and dryer out in the kitchen to clean behind them and hopefully scare the mouse out at the same time. See, then The Cat might get a mouse and be content before I shatter his world with a completely new sound which may rattle him to the bones.

I'm off now to reconcile the mess that has suddenly appeared now that we have concrete reports to rely on. It's terrifying what has happened in the interim. I think people decided that the new chart of accounts system was too difficult to learn so they just made up their own.

The Best Weekend Ever

So this weekend started as most do on Friday afternoon not because I left work early or anything unless you count mentally leaving in which case most of us take the whole frickin' day off but when my physical body caught up with my mental body(?) at home on Friday evening I was so prepared for Saturday that there wasn't much left to do and in case you don't know what I'm referring to I'm talking about the Sisters of the Sahara hafla that happened Saturday night which I was lucky enough to be a part of by dancing three what? yes three dances and I don't know how I managed to get myself into that either it must have been my cat-like stealth but I was hoping that for the Turkish dance I would be in the back row but due to the fact that the class is full of tall goddess-like creatures and I'm on the shorter side of stockiness I was in the front row and on the right side but only right if you're in the audience looking at us but since I'm not in the audience looking at me I was on my left side which on that particular stage meant that I was to be the last person off of the stage which provided a nice comedic moment because I had two group dances in a row which I loved because there was no time to get nervous again before the second one but since I was the last one off after the first one I turned around right away and I swear to god there was someone standing in the wings who said OKAY GO BACK OUT THERE in a loud whisper or maybe it was my inner dialogue but I listened to who or whatever the voice was and turned right around and went back out to my spot almost in the same spot as for the first dance but what was different this time is I turned around and there was no one out there with me because my second group was off looking for me back stage not realizing that I was already out there so there I stood by myself with my hands at my hips instead of up in the air like the sound guy in the booth who was frantically trying to figure out why there was just one person standing there instead of a group which he thought there would be but since I had assumed the position he started the music so I tried to nicely shake my head to politely ask could he please turn the music off because my cohorts will be along shortly which he must have understood and maybe he's part vulcan but anyway the music ceased just in time for everyone in the audience to be able to clearly hear YOUR ON!! GET OUT THERE!! WHERE IS SHE?? SHE'S ALREADY OUT THERE! OH! GO!GO!GO! so they went and waved to me as they came out and I don't think we could have choreographed a better laugh-getter than that but I'm glad they laughed at that and not at my very first dance which was my drum solo that I had choreographed the hell out of and included a veil which I tussled with during the beginning of the dance when the chiffon veil didn't want to stay on my chiffon-covered arm like it did when I practiced at home and maybe veils get stage-fright or something but I was determined to get that fucking veil EXACTLY WHERE I WANTED IT TO GO which included over my head and DAMMIT GET OUT OF MY HAIR AND FLING THROUGH THE AIR LIKE WE PRACTICED but by the time I had started to win the battle the veil portion of the dance was over so I flung it on the ground but got in an extra kick when I was turning just to show it who's boss and did you know that dancers have been known to take a shot before they go out only not directly before they go out it's more like when they're in the dressing room and the nerves start to kick in to the point where your lips quiver when you're not even smiling or maybe it was the party atmosphere that made her do it and I mean the one who was standing with her back to me when I opened the dressing room door and she turned dressed in her cute outfit with a cute flower in her cute hair batting her cute eyelashes at me and smiling while holding the biggest bottle of Jagermiester I've ever seen which had already been imbibed upon and some people might call that picture a dichotomy but I call it damn funny which only added to the holiday spirit I was suddenly engulfed in with my mom and friends in the audience and people I knew all around back stage with all of us doing fun stuff which continued after the event when I hopped in my car to drive out to the boon docks to join more friends for mirth and merriment but not until I first stopped at the wrong house which also had a lot of cars in the parking lot in my defense which would make anyone think that there was a party going on in there and maybe there was but you'd have to ask Laszlo because he actually walked into the house which still makes me giggle internally when I think about it because I only stood outside while the little girl inside looked very disapprovingly at me while shaking her head when I asked if this was so-and-so's house but alas I finally found the correct driveway which was only one driveway away where I stayed and listened to people talk and break stemwear but I finally had to go home when my legs hurt when I stood and when I sat down so I took my hurted legs home and tucked them into bed where they wanted to stay well into the next morning but my eyeballs didn't because they popped awake at 8am and it's a good thing the eyelids are there to hold them in which told me that part of me was still pretty giddy from the day before where I think my own little holiday had occurred during this season of celebration. Whew, best weekend ever.

Can I Go Now?

AAAAAAACK! It's a little cold out. I hate that itching sensation that occurs as your skin thaws. I almost wish I could peel my skin off and toss it in the dryer for a little while. Fluff it up a bit.

I missed the college holiday gathering yesterday. Instead, my mom took me out to Groth Music in Bloomington and bought me...get a load of this...an oboe. That's right. I played one when I was a kid all the way through high school but I never owned my own so when I was out of the Mpls Public School system, I was out of an oboe too. In case you haven't heard, Groth Music is having a markdown sale where every couple of days, the prices drop until Dec 31st when most things will be listed for $1. There's probably a decent chance that we could have waited another week or so since oboe's aren't all that popular, but once I saw it and played it, I wanted it right away. It was already half-priced and for a Larilee made in 2000 with grenadilla wood, it's an excellent deal. Since I haven't played in nearly 20 years, it took a moment (okay, several minutes) for me to be able to get a nice sound out of it and remember that using the diaphragm is very important. It's a good replacement for crunches. I can't wait to play it at home and scare the crap out of The Cat.

I'm very jazzed about this weekend. Dahlal Int'l, a belly dance costuming company, will be at Jawaahir on Saturday morning where I will hopefully be able to buy a shirt before the hafla Saturday evening and then race out to a party where I'll get to see people I miss terribly and have funfunfunfunfunfunfun....and then veg out on Sunday. How awesome is that?

Before I can get to that I have to get through the rest of the crap on my desk though. I'm armed with coffee, it should be relatively painless.

Ugh

Boy, some days crap gets to me way more than on other days.

I know someone who's cheated on his wife and his wife doesn't know about it....yet (she will because they always do, ALWAYS). When I point out what a dog he is, he comes back with "You're a prude" as if that'll explain and justify all actions. My anger has nothing to do with sex, believe me, I'm all for it. It's the fact that he knows it'll hurt his wife but he did it anyway. You want to have sex with someone else? Fine, tell your wife that - "Honey, I want to jack-off every ten minutes and you're not around every ten minutes so whadda 'ya say to me having sex with other people?" She may totally go for the idea because she may not want to be around you every ten minutes. Don't hand me the line of how you need to have sex either. No one needs to. Humans need to inhale a combination of oxygen, nitrogen, and water vapor and then consume nutrients and pay their taxes, not necessarily in that order. That's all. Everything else is a want.

Are you really willing to lose the environment you have now; the one with the nice house you've worked hard to buy, the kids you've raised, the relationship you've built with someone whose face you can look into without flinching and find peace and reassurance there? You're willing to throw all of that away for a ten-second orgasm? You know it only lasts ten seconds! Admit it!!

Maybe I shouldn't have had that conversation on a day where the lazy-ass co-worker who doesn't pull his weight is really not pulling his weight; and I'm greeted in the morning with a news story about how punks break into someone's home, beating the hell out of them and stealing their things because they somehow think they're entitled to act like that; and people aren't trying to make me find ways of giving even more money to someone whose had everything paid for him up until this point and now has a major company asking him to work for them but gosh, he may have to pay his own health insurance for a few months...maybe all of these things shouldn't have converged on one day along with the fact that I have access to a keyboard and internet screen where I can lay it all out for you.

That last paragraph made me a little dizzy.

After all of this rage, that one stupid thought keeps coming back to me - you can't force someone else to do something. Things just happen the way they happen and in the meantime, I better check myself to make sure I'm in line with what I'm saying. I know no one's perfect but you have to at least try. Okay, you don't have to be perfect but how about not purposely hurting someone? How about that?

Blip

While it may be a bit nippier than we're used to lately, it's not truly cold yet because my coffee is still reasonably warm after the walk from the coffee house to my office. Although this morning did remind me of how difficult it is for me to get out of bed for the purpose of walking three miles in the cold air. This is why I keep buying the frou-frou coffee; I have to have a reward at the end of the challenge.

As much as I'd love to spit out at least two more paragraphs of stunning prose, I'm running late and have to hit the reports now. Apparently my brain is in a recession.

Guard Your Decorations

Here we all are, back at where ever it was we were on Wednesday afternoon at 3:00pm when many statuses (stati?) on Facebook started to change to "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE". My phone display shows the date right next to the time. I've glanced over twice already and thought it was lunchtime. What a let-down.

It's that time of year again, time for the holiday TPT Pledge Drive this Wednesday evening. These promos are a lot of fun. It's amazing how goofy one gets when half-dressed in renaissance garb...in a room filled with others half-dressed in renaissance garb. Nerdy? Yeah, maybe but we get free dinner and a chance to wear headsets. I believe our show this time is going to be some type of How-To-Spend-Your-Money-Wisely show. We'll of course be asking for that wisely-spent money during the breaks.

I have a dentist appointment today. I'm thinking of eating a pack of Oreos before heading in. Not because I want to be mean, but the hygienist commented last time that my teeth were very clean and she didn't really need to do anything. I'm going to have to get my money's worth so, Oreos or Butterfingers.

My sweet, adorable, loving little Cat kills anything with fur. This is usually a trait I encourage since he's the only one I want in the house with fur. I have a christmas tree that has fur though. It's one of those white plumage-type trees that I got at The Afternoon after the holidays. I've decided to give it a go and set it out on the kitchen table to see if it get's "killed". I'm wondering if it's just the sight of fur that enrages him or if he can discern inanimate objects covered in a fur-like material. I'll soon find out. Wouldn't that be hilarious to see a cat attack a tree?