Catch-up

I had to wait a whole five and a half hours to write today because as soon as I got in, I was bombarded with transactions being made on wrong account numbers. While I was figuring out one problem and who was doing it, someone else was expensing something they shouldn't to somewhere they shouldn't. I feel like I'm chasing my tail.

Speaking of tails, I haven't seen the mouse back yet. Maybe The Cat did get him when I wasn't around. I think that may be the case because he's not camped out in front of the cupboard where the mouse was gracious enough to leave his droppings behind. If there's a mouse anywhere in the house, The Cat will plop himself directly in front of where the mouse actually is although the mouse is often not visible to human eyes. The Cat will proceed to not move an inch until he's captured said mouse. This morning, The Cat was not camped out but instead, under foot.

Speaking of feet, I didn't have to lift mine has high on the way home last night because most people had shoveled by then. There is one block along the river road where someone must own an industrial-sized snow blower or just like to walk and blow at the same time because the entire block had been cleared. Isn't that the nicest thing ever? I would LOVE it if someone would do that to my block. There were other blocks where no one had shoveled yet this morning and by now, lots of people have trampled across it so now the snow is really packed down. You know it's going to stay there the entire winter.

Speaking of winter, it's here.

Speaking of here, my lunch time is up so I have to go back to chasing my tail.

Shoveled Walks Are An Oasis

Boy, that Pavarotti sure could sing. I was all cozy last night on the couch thinking it was a perfect night to do just that since I had already shoveled and loaded the mouse ammo in the kitchen. I have a mouse back again and I'm a bit surprised that The Cat hasn't been able to get it yet. He was noisy Sunday night when I didn't have any ammo and mysteriously quiet last night when I finally cocked and loaded the trap directly in his path. Sneaky little fuckers. Anyway, I thought I had completed my civic duty of clearing my walkway only to discover this morning that even more snow had fallen since I finished. It hadn't just fallen on my sidewalk either, unfortunately. That meant walking through snow all the way to work this morning. Before you start to scoff and exclaim that it's only 3 inches or so, go walk through it for three miles on suddenly uneven terrain that was even only a few days ago which makes you appear intoxicated as you trudge on with your bag around your shoulder filled with coffee and normal clothing. Now I remember why I liked spring so much last year.

I love the Thermos. Brilliant invention. We have a little coffee maker in our copy room but my supervisor keeps forgetting to either turn off the burner after she's done, which scorches the coffee to the pot, or forgets to empty the grounds, which grow mold on them over the weekend. I'm not using that coffee maker anymore.

I suddenly realized last night that New Years' Eve is coming up. This may come as a surprise to you also which is why I decided to mention it here. I spent thirteen years always having to work on New Years' Eve so now that I don't work in an industry that's open absolutely every day of the year, I forget what it is people usually do on that evening. I know what I don't want to do. I don't want to go to a hotel bar and have fifty million Long Island Ice Teas to the point where I puke in the restroom, or lean over the railing and puke, or throw up into the pool, or fight in the lobby. I've been on the other end of that and I'd hate to start anyone else's new year on that note.

Speaking of notes, I haven't tried my oboe yet at home. I didn't have time over the weekend and last night I was waaaaaaaay too busy watching A Charlie Brown Christmas. I think tonight would be good after I move the fridge and dryer out in the kitchen to clean behind them and hopefully scare the mouse out at the same time. See, then The Cat might get a mouse and be content before I shatter his world with a completely new sound which may rattle him to the bones.

I'm off now to reconcile the mess that has suddenly appeared now that we have concrete reports to rely on. It's terrifying what has happened in the interim. I think people decided that the new chart of accounts system was too difficult to learn so they just made up their own.

The Best Weekend Ever

So this weekend started as most do on Friday afternoon not because I left work early or anything unless you count mentally leaving in which case most of us take the whole frickin' day off but when my physical body caught up with my mental body(?) at home on Friday evening I was so prepared for Saturday that there wasn't much left to do and in case you don't know what I'm referring to I'm talking about the Sisters of the Sahara hafla that happened Saturday night which I was lucky enough to be a part of by dancing three what? yes three dances and I don't know how I managed to get myself into that either it must have been my cat-like stealth but I was hoping that for the Turkish dance I would be in the back row but due to the fact that the class is full of tall goddess-like creatures and I'm on the shorter side of stockiness I was in the front row and on the right side but only right if you're in the audience looking at us but since I'm not in the audience looking at me I was on my left side which on that particular stage meant that I was to be the last person off of the stage which provided a nice comedic moment because I had two group dances in a row which I loved because there was no time to get nervous again before the second one but since I was the last one off after the first one I turned around right away and I swear to god there was someone standing in the wings who said OKAY GO BACK OUT THERE in a loud whisper or maybe it was my inner dialogue but I listened to who or whatever the voice was and turned right around and went back out to my spot almost in the same spot as for the first dance but what was different this time is I turned around and there was no one out there with me because my second group was off looking for me back stage not realizing that I was already out there so there I stood by myself with my hands at my hips instead of up in the air like the sound guy in the booth who was frantically trying to figure out why there was just one person standing there instead of a group which he thought there would be but since I had assumed the position he started the music so I tried to nicely shake my head to politely ask could he please turn the music off because my cohorts will be along shortly which he must have understood and maybe he's part vulcan but anyway the music ceased just in time for everyone in the audience to be able to clearly hear YOUR ON!! GET OUT THERE!! WHERE IS SHE?? SHE'S ALREADY OUT THERE! OH! GO!GO!GO! so they went and waved to me as they came out and I don't think we could have choreographed a better laugh-getter than that but I'm glad they laughed at that and not at my very first dance which was my drum solo that I had choreographed the hell out of and included a veil which I tussled with during the beginning of the dance when the chiffon veil didn't want to stay on my chiffon-covered arm like it did when I practiced at home and maybe veils get stage-fright or something but I was determined to get that fucking veil EXACTLY WHERE I WANTED IT TO GO which included over my head and DAMMIT GET OUT OF MY HAIR AND FLING THROUGH THE AIR LIKE WE PRACTICED but by the time I had started to win the battle the veil portion of the dance was over so I flung it on the ground but got in an extra kick when I was turning just to show it who's boss and did you know that dancers have been known to take a shot before they go out only not directly before they go out it's more like when they're in the dressing room and the nerves start to kick in to the point where your lips quiver when you're not even smiling or maybe it was the party atmosphere that made her do it and I mean the one who was standing with her back to me when I opened the dressing room door and she turned dressed in her cute outfit with a cute flower in her cute hair batting her cute eyelashes at me and smiling while holding the biggest bottle of Jagermiester I've ever seen which had already been imbibed upon and some people might call that picture a dichotomy but I call it damn funny which only added to the holiday spirit I was suddenly engulfed in with my mom and friends in the audience and people I knew all around back stage with all of us doing fun stuff which continued after the event when I hopped in my car to drive out to the boon docks to join more friends for mirth and merriment but not until I first stopped at the wrong house which also had a lot of cars in the parking lot in my defense which would make anyone think that there was a party going on in there and maybe there was but you'd have to ask Laszlo because he actually walked into the house which still makes me giggle internally when I think about it because I only stood outside while the little girl inside looked very disapprovingly at me while shaking her head when I asked if this was so-and-so's house but alas I finally found the correct driveway which was only one driveway away where I stayed and listened to people talk and break stemwear but I finally had to go home when my legs hurt when I stood and when I sat down so I took my hurted legs home and tucked them into bed where they wanted to stay well into the next morning but my eyeballs didn't because they popped awake at 8am and it's a good thing the eyelids are there to hold them in which told me that part of me was still pretty giddy from the day before where I think my own little holiday had occurred during this season of celebration. Whew, best weekend ever.

Can I Go Now?

AAAAAAACK! It's a little cold out. I hate that itching sensation that occurs as your skin thaws. I almost wish I could peel my skin off and toss it in the dryer for a little while. Fluff it up a bit.

I missed the college holiday gathering yesterday. Instead, my mom took me out to Groth Music in Bloomington and bought me...get a load of this...an oboe. That's right. I played one when I was a kid all the way through high school but I never owned my own so when I was out of the Mpls Public School system, I was out of an oboe too. In case you haven't heard, Groth Music is having a markdown sale where every couple of days, the prices drop until Dec 31st when most things will be listed for $1. There's probably a decent chance that we could have waited another week or so since oboe's aren't all that popular, but once I saw it and played it, I wanted it right away. It was already half-priced and for a Larilee made in 2000 with grenadilla wood, it's an excellent deal. Since I haven't played in nearly 20 years, it took a moment (okay, several minutes) for me to be able to get a nice sound out of it and remember that using the diaphragm is very important. It's a good replacement for crunches. I can't wait to play it at home and scare the crap out of The Cat.

I'm very jazzed about this weekend. Dahlal Int'l, a belly dance costuming company, will be at Jawaahir on Saturday morning where I will hopefully be able to buy a shirt before the hafla Saturday evening and then race out to a party where I'll get to see people I miss terribly and have funfunfunfunfunfunfun....and then veg out on Sunday. How awesome is that?

Before I can get to that I have to get through the rest of the crap on my desk though. I'm armed with coffee, it should be relatively painless.

Ugh

Boy, some days crap gets to me way more than on other days.

I know someone who's cheated on his wife and his wife doesn't know about it....yet (she will because they always do, ALWAYS). When I point out what a dog he is, he comes back with "You're a prude" as if that'll explain and justify all actions. My anger has nothing to do with sex, believe me, I'm all for it. It's the fact that he knows it'll hurt his wife but he did it anyway. You want to have sex with someone else? Fine, tell your wife that - "Honey, I want to jack-off every ten minutes and you're not around every ten minutes so whadda 'ya say to me having sex with other people?" She may totally go for the idea because she may not want to be around you every ten minutes. Don't hand me the line of how you need to have sex either. No one needs to. Humans need to inhale a combination of oxygen, nitrogen, and water vapor and then consume nutrients and pay their taxes, not necessarily in that order. That's all. Everything else is a want.

Are you really willing to lose the environment you have now; the one with the nice house you've worked hard to buy, the kids you've raised, the relationship you've built with someone whose face you can look into without flinching and find peace and reassurance there? You're willing to throw all of that away for a ten-second orgasm? You know it only lasts ten seconds! Admit it!!

Maybe I shouldn't have had that conversation on a day where the lazy-ass co-worker who doesn't pull his weight is really not pulling his weight; and I'm greeted in the morning with a news story about how punks break into someone's home, beating the hell out of them and stealing their things because they somehow think they're entitled to act like that; and people aren't trying to make me find ways of giving even more money to someone whose had everything paid for him up until this point and now has a major company asking him to work for them but gosh, he may have to pay his own health insurance for a few months...maybe all of these things shouldn't have converged on one day along with the fact that I have access to a keyboard and internet screen where I can lay it all out for you.

That last paragraph made me a little dizzy.

After all of this rage, that one stupid thought keeps coming back to me - you can't force someone else to do something. Things just happen the way they happen and in the meantime, I better check myself to make sure I'm in line with what I'm saying. I know no one's perfect but you have to at least try. Okay, you don't have to be perfect but how about not purposely hurting someone? How about that?

Blip

While it may be a bit nippier than we're used to lately, it's not truly cold yet because my coffee is still reasonably warm after the walk from the coffee house to my office. Although this morning did remind me of how difficult it is for me to get out of bed for the purpose of walking three miles in the cold air. This is why I keep buying the frou-frou coffee; I have to have a reward at the end of the challenge.

As much as I'd love to spit out at least two more paragraphs of stunning prose, I'm running late and have to hit the reports now. Apparently my brain is in a recession.

Guard Your Decorations

Here we all are, back at where ever it was we were on Wednesday afternoon at 3:00pm when many statuses (stati?) on Facebook started to change to "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE". My phone display shows the date right next to the time. I've glanced over twice already and thought it was lunchtime. What a let-down.

It's that time of year again, time for the holiday TPT Pledge Drive this Wednesday evening. These promos are a lot of fun. It's amazing how goofy one gets when half-dressed in renaissance garb...in a room filled with others half-dressed in renaissance garb. Nerdy? Yeah, maybe but we get free dinner and a chance to wear headsets. I believe our show this time is going to be some type of How-To-Spend-Your-Money-Wisely show. We'll of course be asking for that wisely-spent money during the breaks.

I have a dentist appointment today. I'm thinking of eating a pack of Oreos before heading in. Not because I want to be mean, but the hygienist commented last time that my teeth were very clean and she didn't really need to do anything. I'm going to have to get my money's worth so, Oreos or Butterfingers.

My sweet, adorable, loving little Cat kills anything with fur. This is usually a trait I encourage since he's the only one I want in the house with fur. I have a christmas tree that has fur though. It's one of those white plumage-type trees that I got at The Afternoon after the holidays. I've decided to give it a go and set it out on the kitchen table to see if it get's "killed". I'm wondering if it's just the sight of fur that enrages him or if he can discern inanimate objects covered in a fur-like material. I'll soon find out. Wouldn't that be hilarious to see a cat attack a tree?